Get In My Belly!

Posted on December 1, 2003

Dawn wrote: Ok, I started talking to this guy online, he sent me a picture of him. He was wearing this really nice tux, looked really good, so I think to myself, hmm,, okay we should go out. So my first mistake was to tell him where I lived. He comes over at like 9pm on a Sat. night. I see his car pull up I look out the window to see if he's getting out of the car, and the phone rings, its him. He wont come to the door, I ask why? My apartment complex is the same one his ex lives in and he doesn't want to run into her. Okay, so if that wasn't enough, I go downstairs, and I get in the car. What do I see? Can you say FAT BASTARD FROM AUSTIN POWERS? OK, I think I could have rolled in a ball and been able to fit in his stomach! . So I think, OK we can make the best of this. We live about 20 miles outside of Detroit. So he takes me to this Mexican place in the middle of the slums of Detroit... where he decides to drive 5 miles an hour to get there... We get to this place and we walk in. The hostess asks us if we need menus, I say yes since I had never been there before, he tells her no, I wont need one. So I repeat that I need one and the hostess gives me one, and HE TAKES IT FROM ME!!! Telling me that I will have the chicken fajitas. Well, I don't want that, so, I ask for the menu back, and he proceeds to tell me there's no need, he will order for me! EEK! Well, the waitress comes and brings us chips and salsa, they were gone in like 2.3 seconds- he ate them all. She takes our order, when he tried to order for me, I interrupt and put in my order, and the waitress just gives me this :I am really sorry" look...well, the food comes and he has so much food it could feel a family of 10 for a month. So we eat. He talks and talks and talks. I know EVERY ex girlfriend, one night stand and crush the guy ever had.. Plus I learned of his gas problems when eating beans- guess what was part of his meal? Yup- beans. I swear to you, the other people in the area changed tables he was so annoying... OK, I know this is a long story.. So he FINALLY gets me home at like midnight.. And he asks if he can see me again because I am so wonderful- cope don't think so. 30 mins later I get an email begging me to see him again.. I reply nicely that I am not interested. So OK, nothing for like a month till I get an instant message asking me to help him get a new computer by changing my long distance service- I THINK NOT- so I went off.... and told him EXACTLY what I thought!!

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